not being able to be with someone you care about is one of the worst feelings in the world. I HATE IT. whether it be 10 miles or 1,000, there’s no better feeling than being with that one special person. After a while, you can only take so much separation and negligence & it drives you to the point where you feel like you’ve done something wrong or not doing what you’re supposed to do. I know I’ve done nothing wrong but.. I feel like something needs fixed. I’m not going to make anyone who doesn’t like me, like me. I refuse to be in a relationship with someone who doesn’t put in as much as I do.
Personally, it takes a while for me to put my trust into someone & actually start to care. I stop putting myself first & start break down the wall that I’ve placed from previous relationships. I HATE when fe(males) say “all guys/girls are alike”.. no all of the people you’ve messed with, are alike. Nowadays, females are getting into relationships for the wrong reasons. No, you don’t need a boyfriend to buy you things or make you happy. As good as each of those things sound, they aren’t needed. BUT, sometimes a girl just wants to be held.. and that’s how I’m feeling right now. There’s so much built up emotion that I need to release, but I don’t want to seem like a crazy girlfriend. Shoot, I’m not even in a relationship.
When people say “You have hoes”, that doesn’t make someone feel better, because that’s NOT cute.. When you’re focusing on someone in particular & you’re getting attention from other people (& you have the same personality I have), it makes you look like you’re doing something wrong & trying to accomodate yourself to satisfying them & not that ONE particular person. I’m not a mean person, so when someone gives me a compliment I’m not going to say “shut up, leave me alone” or just a dry “thank you”, because I know if I was just being nice to someone, I wouldn’t want to be played.
I’m confused, emotional, & somewhat vulnerable. I feel like I’m caring too much..